spring haiku de printemps – on a rainy day = un jour pluvieux on a rainy day a kestrel skirts the bay – echoes in the pines un jour pluvieux une crécerelle survole la baie – échos des pins Richard Vallance
senryu – empty glasses = les verres vides empty glasses carillons chiming in echoes in echoes les verres vides qui carillonnent, nous charment échos en échos Richard Vallance
summer haiku d’hiver – in the thunderstorm = orage de tonnerre in the thunderstorm gusts whip up the lake – loons echo through rain orage de tonnerre, les rafales fouettent le lac – échos des huards Richard Vallance
summer haiku d’hiver – on a stifling night – la nuit trop chaude on a stifling night wolves howl at the moon echoing loons la nuit trop chaude, les loups hurlent à la lune, échos des huards Richard Vallance
summer haiku – the loons’ howls = les hurlements des huards REVISED buoyed over lakes the loons’ howls warbling through the thunderstorm survolant les lacs les hurlements des huards pendant l’orage Richard Vallance I have changed the second and third lines of the English version this haiku from the original: the loons’ warbling howls in the thunderstorm in order to convey the subtler feeling that the howls of the loons pierce through the thunderstorm from their direction, while simultaneously we as humans hear their warbling howls from the other direction through the thunderstorm. The word “through” renders the howling bidirectional. Moreover, by reversing “warbling howls” to “howls warbling”, “warbling” is transformed from an adjective to an active present participle, making it verbal instead of merely attributive. All of this goes to show that every single word and moreover, the position of every single word in any haiku has an enormous influence on the impact of the haiku on the reader.